Okay, so putting together your CV is a hard task, we know this much. Regardless how long you’ve been in the workforce, running through all your experience with a fine tooth comb to pick out the best bits, then condensing everything down into a 1-2 page document is no mean feat.
If you’re sat there trying to make yours read really well and need some kind of break, you’ve come to the right place. While I’m a firm believer in being a nice person and not laughing at people’s mistakes, I’m also a huge fan of harmless fun. CareerJourney.co.uk has put together an infographic (below) detailing some of the funniest Cv and resume mistakes. Don’t worry, there’s no naming and shaming here so you can digest completely guilt-free.
Spelling mistakes & typos
It’s amazing how much difference 1 or 2 letters can make in a word! It’s always advised to have someone else proofread your CV before you send it off toa potential employer… and for good reason. I’m a little sceptical about whether someone actually put these into their resume, but either way, it’ll help you crack a smile!
- “Speak English and Spinach”
- “Dear Sir or Madman”
- “Hope to hear from you shorty”
- “I held sex positions as a manager”
- “Managing steak-holders”
- “Graduated in 1882”
Could you actually be any less specific?
- “Worked with employees”
- “Worked in hotels”
- “Managed projects”
Sorry, who are you?
- No name
- No contact details
- No personal profile
- Incorrect area code
- Only a first name
- Wrong email address (shortybabyluvsyou@gmail.com)
Clutter & noise!
- Too much text without spacing
- No paragraphing or bullet points
- Pictures everywhere (your dog is cute, but no)
- EVERYTHING IN CAPITAL LETTERS
- Colourful CV – why are the titles in pink? You like the colour, oh right…
Lies, lies, lies and completely irrelevant information!
- “I for 15 years as a bank manager” … when you just turned 30
- “I earned 100k at McDonalds” … weren’t you there part time?
- “Managed over 100 people” … when your company has 50 employees
- “I hate spiders” … yeah me too actually, fair play
- “Hair colour black” … congratulations! You’ve got the role, black hair is exactly what we’re after in our new director!
- “Can drink 100 beers without getting too drunk” … okay no one would put this in their CV, I’m calling it!
TMI TMI TMI:
I left my last job because:
- “Responsibility makes me nervous”
- “I am not smart enough to do the job”
- “My affair with the boss broke down”
Right, now get back to writing your CV! And DON’T be guilty of the above 🙂
