If You Want Change to Happen, Start with Yourself!

We all talk about how change is needed.

We all talk about how we all must embrace change.

And we philosophize how change is so good for us all.

Are we not just wonderful people?! Or are we not just a tad hypocritical?

The value of change:

Intellectually we all accept the value of change, but we are not so ebullient when it comes down to us being the one who must change.

Trust me I say this not from the perspective of lecturing from the pulpit or from the top of the room, as I include myself in this admonition!

I worked some time ago with the boss of a large company – very successful in their own field – and his issue was that he felt his own top team were not showing sufficient initiative and he wanted that to change.

In the very first session with the team I quickly realized why that issue existed!

By: The Duffy Agency

We were having a discussion about an issue (non contentious, let me say!) when one of the team suggested a different course of action than was currently being taken. Instead of welcoming this suggestion the boss harangued the poor individual for coming up with such a “stupid idea. That is an exact quote!

Now I knew why initiative was not forthcoming in this team – the issue was not the team, but the boss! He was not too thrilled when I pointed this out!

Is that an extreme example? Well, perhaps, but it is reflective of many situations – perhaps not as dramatic, but true nevertheless.

Start with you!

I learned a long time ago that the behavior of my team is a reflection of me – when it is good, it is easy to bask in the glory! But when the behavior is not what I want to see – then it is harder to accept. But it is still true even it took me a while to fully accept! So, if I want something to change in my business, then I must first look at what I need to change about myself!

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself”

– Leo Tolstoy

So, very true – it always comes back to me! If I want to change my life, then it must start with me – not anything external, not the market, not others to change, just me!

Gandhi said:

“Be the change you want to see in the world”

…and that is tough, when what I want is others to change, not me!

The biggest change:

The biggest change will often have to come in how we view things – how we perceive the world is treating us, how hard done by we are, how unfair life is.

This is true in our professional lives as much as our personal lives

Wayne Dyer once said:

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change”

How true but how challenging!

So, the next time you want something to change, look inside yourself and determine what it is about you that must change. Start there first!

By John Murphy

John Murphy is founder of JohnMurphyInternational, a specialist online coaching business. John specializes in advising and mentoring entrepreneurs and senior executives on how to build their business and be effective as a leader and manager.

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