One of my favourite sites, Happy Place, posted 35 (other) things you absolutely MUST agree upon before getting married based on a Hufftington Post article. I decided this was a great list but it needed another scenario.
Therefore, I came up with 35 things you must decide on before being hired – imagine this being asked in a final interview:
- Why is it open source if companies take the software and then sell it? (i.e. Linux RedHat, MongoDB…)
- What’s your office stimulant of choice: Starbucks, Red Bull, Adderall or Cocaine?
- Grumpy Cat or Office Cat?
- Did Han Solo or Greedo shoot first?
- Is stealing code off GitHub okay if you’re lazy?
- Let’s talk internships: hot co-ed with no skills or skilled intern whose face was lit on fire and put out with a wire brush and a tennis racquet?
- If we hire a new developer, how long until we make them code for 12 hours straight with no breaks?
- iOS, Android or are you a loser with, like, a Nokia or something?
- You’re supposed to be working but you’re on Reddit, Facebook, Digg or…4Chan?
- Star Trek, Star Wars, or both?
- There’s been an apocalypse. We have one can of Red Bull left. Will you or me stay awake long enough to drink it?
- When you finish your breakfast, do you have more syrup stains or a mouth stained by a sugared cereal?
- If you were to perpetrate an office massacre, would you kill indiscriminately or the people who wronged you, like that hottie in accounting who won’t even speak with you?
- YouPorn or XHamster?
- NASA or FEMA?
- Cartoon Network or Lifetime?
- When the office gets too messy, do we move? Or burn it down then move? Or shove everything in a desk drawer in reception?
- Harry Potter: the books or the audio books? If you answered the movies, you’re already out.
- You’re on the toilet making a horrible, sinful poop. Your boss walks in. Pucker or let ‘er rip?
- Ian McKellan or Patrick Stewart?
- Shower or Grower?
- Ancient Aliens: Did they build the Mayan and Aztec Ziggurats or just the Pyramids?
- If you had a time machine, would you go back and kill Hitler or would you prevent Windows Vista?
- Austin Powers or James Bond?
- Craft Brew or PBR?
- Eating Habits: Vegan, Freegan Vegetarian, Pescaterian or Not an asshole?
- Better on hipsters: skinny jeans or unquenchable flames?
- Who killed JFK? Oswald, Illuminati, The Mafia or the ZOG?
- Teaser, pleaser, shocker or spocker?
- If you run out of clean plates do you: do dishes, make one out of Legos, or eat off discarded junk mail?
- Justin Bieber or a cat in a canvas sack being beaten with sticks?
- Palm Pilot or Blackberry?
- Skin that looks like leather or a leather outfit made out of human skin?
- Put the lotion in the basket or do you prefer the hose, for a second time?
- When sharing a meal with a joint check, do you round your share or contribute exactly the amount, to the penny, of your share?
Anymore questions? Leave them in the comments below!
